Lord Elrond, Tickle Master!
by Mustard Lady
Summary: Thranduil's little princess has been rather sassy, thinking she can get away with saying mischievous things to our stern elf lord without retaliation. Elrond may look deadly serious, but don't let that fool you!


**Raena suggested this for a story. Thank you, Raena. I don't own LOTR. Hope you all enjoy it!**

**There is one part in here with grown Legolas and Elrond referring to tickling him. I am by no means implying any sexual or suggestive talk! He was only teasing him to cut him off guard, that's all! **

* * *

**Alasse is being a little bit sassy and thinks stern Elrond is too serious to retaliate. Boy, is she wrong! **

* * *

Although Thranduil was a bit put off at how 'easy' Lord Elrond had it living in the peaceful valley of Imladris, even he had to admit, coming here for a respite had not been a bad idea! It had been a welcome break from the daily pressures and politics that came with being king of the Woodland Realm, not to mention the increasing dangers that were starting to invade his forest. But having a vacation in Rivendell with his two children had certainly been worth it! They were not so tense and were free to be themselves. And Thranduil was welcome to _all_ the wine he desired!

* * *

Legolas was off with his friends Elrohir and Elladan, training with Glorfindel, and trying to come up with the most effective way to get under Erestor's skin this time. Celebrian was helping Arwen with her hair after playing outside before she and Alasse had tea together. Alasse was in the sitting room on her father's lap, reading a book (she LOVED Lord Elrond's library). Elrond was discussing business with Thranduil or something like that, things Alasse had absolutely no interest in whatsoever.

Alasse cocked her head and looked up at Thranduil. "Excuse me, Ada. May I ask a question?" She spoke up.

"Certainly. And excellent job remembering your manners." Thranduil smiled.

"Ada, what does '_son of an Orc' _mean?" Alasse asked innocently. Thranduil and Elrond both froze dumbfounded. They looked horrified, and Alasse didn't understand. What had she said?

"_Alasse Thranduiliel!"_ Thranduil scolded. "Don't you ever use that phrase again! It is not befitting for a princess!" Alasse was stunned, and her lip began to tremble. What had she done?

"I-I'm sorry, Ada. I didn't know." She whimpered.

"My friend, she's a child. She doesn't understand." Elrond said quietly. Thranduil softened when he looked at his daughter. She was starting to cry, not sure what crime she'd just committed. She'd just asked a question!

"It's alright, Alasse. It's not your fault." He said more gently. "The phrase you just said, it's not proper. It's a curse word used for ne'er-do-wells, and bad people. Really bad people. But it's a very strong curse word. So you must not use it, ever. Do you understand?"

"Yes." Alasse wiped her eyes. "I'm sorry, Ada. I didn't know it was a bad word! I'm sorry!"

"Now, stop crying, iel. You didn't know. And you did the right thing, asking me what it meant."

"I did?"

"Ai. That is what I am here for." Thranduil smiled warmly.

"Alasse, where did you hear such language, child?" Elrond asked, stepping over to them. Alasse hung her head and played with her dress.

"Alasse, Lord Elrond asked you a question. It is disrespectful to ignore him."

"It was...I can't tell." Alasse said timidly.

"It's alright, penneth. It's your job to tell me." Thranduil said. Alasse wouldn't meet his face.

"Legolas, and 'Dan, and 'Ro." She mumbled. "They were talking about some people, and I...heard them say it. I don't think they liked those people." Thranduil and Elrond rolled their eyes, exasperated. They were going to need to have a serious talk with the younger ellyn about watching what they said, especially around the younger ones. "Please don't tell Legolas that I told you, Ada! He'll say I was being a tattletale." Alasse begged.

"Don't worry about him, iel nin." Thranduil grinned. "You only did what I told you. And if Legolas throws a fit over the fact, well then, he will answer to me."

"Here we are, all ready for tea." Celebrian greeted as she and Arwen stepped inside. "Alasse, you girls will be having strawberry tarts and blueberry cakes with yours, in the playroom."

"Oh, good!" Alasse clapped her hands.

"Run along, my little elf maiden. Enjoy yourself." Thranduil said. Alasse slipped off his lap and ran with Arwen to the playroom, but she forgot to bow in front of Elrond and Celebrian. Not that they minded, really. "I need a drink." Thranduil groaned, facepalming himself.

"Mind if I join you?" Elrond chuckled.

"Is everything alright?" Celebrian asked curiously.

"Oh, nothing, my dear. Only that we are the unsuspecting victims of the Valar's sense of humor." Elrond sighed dramatically. "Nothing on this earth humbles me faster than my children."

"And their lessons in self-consciousness are always the _most _humiliating." Thranduil muttered, taking a generous gulp of wine to drown his 'sorrows'.

"Indeed." Elrond agreed. Celebrian smiled bemusedly. It was cute and so funny seeing both elf lords, normally so serious, acting like sad old hound dogs over something so trivial.

* * *

When the boys returned from training with Glorfindel, their fathers were waiting for them and started in on them right away, telling them what Alasse had said. "Did she really?" Legolas grinned. Elladan and Elrohir tried to look serious but they lost their composure.

"It is _not _funny, Legolas Greenleaf." Thranduil glared. Legolas's shoulders shook from snickering so much.

"Children, this is not to be looked on lightly." Elrond also gave his infamous 'death glare'.

"You are right, Ada." Elladan said with pursed lips.

"From now on, you should watch what you are saying, especially when in front of Alasse and Arwen, and the other elflings."

"Arwen's used to it, Ada." Elrohir spoke up. His brother shook his head, bopping him in the elbow.

"_Farn."_ Elrond narrowed his eyes. They stood quietly. "Arwen has her mother to set her straight." Elrond and Thranduil lectured their sons as hard as they could and the boys promised to be more aware of their speech. But as soon as they were released and departed, they burst out laughing.

"I wish I could've seen the look on Ada's face when she asked _that_ question!" Legolas laughed heartily.

"I wish I could've seen_ our_ father's face!" The brothers added.

* * *

"Time for bed." Elrond announced to Arwen and Alasse in the playroom that night.

"_Awww!"_ The girls groaned. "Already, Ada?" Arwen cocked her head, trying to make her big blue eyes look as sad as possible.

"Yes, I'm afraid so." Elrond nodded, grinning.

"Can't we stay up a little longer, _please?" _Arwen begged.

"Now, now. I know you hate to end your fun for the night, but you've both had a full day of playing together." Elrond said, smiling. "It's time to rest. If I let you stay up, you won't have enough energy to play tomorrow."

"Yes, we will! We'll have enough energy!" Alasse piped up and Arwen nodded her head eagerly. Elrond sighed. Not that he had expected them to act any different, but the older the children became, the smarter and more subtle they tried to be with their arguments.

"Well, I've lived a great deal longer than you, and I said the same thing many times. I was always wrong." Elrond said. "Now, it's time for bed." The two little elleths weren't about to give up.

"But I thought that guests can do whatever they wanted." Alasse said. Arwen brightened.

"That's right!" She exclaimed hopefully.

"Oh, really?" Elrond acted oblivious.

"Yes, Legolas told me! I bet my Ada will let me stay up, since we're visiting." Alasse smiled.

"By all means, ask him, little one." Elrond sighed. Alasse and Arwen raced to the sitting room where Thranduil was sitting cross-legged, talking with Celebrian and Erestor, and drinking wine. Lindir was standing against the wall playing music.

"Ada!" Alasse blurted as she ran to him.

"Slow down, Alasse." Thranduil said. "A princess does not run in the host's home. It's not good manners."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Ada, guests are allowed to do whatever they like, right?" Alasse asked, leaning forward on his knees.

"To a certain extension, yes." Thranduil cocked his head. He had a feeling the children were luring him in to get them out of something as soon as he saw Arwen appear, putting on her best puppy dog face. Elrond was behind her with his arms crossed.

"So, that means if Lord Elrond says it's time for bed, that we don't have to go to bed, right?" Alasse asked excitedly. Thranduil straightened in his chair.

"_Wrong."_ He said dryly.

"What?" Alasse and Arwen's jaws dropped.

"While, yes, we as Lord Elrond's guests are free to 'make ourselves at home', that does not mean we should abuse his generosity." Thranduil explained in his best kingly voice. "He is a good host, and we should respect that. So, no. If he says you must go to bed, then that is what you will do."

"_Awww."_ The girls groaned. "It didn't work." Alasse frowned. "But isn't it not very hospitable to tell guests when to go to bed?" Alasse threw one last attempted argument.

"_Alasse." _Thranduil narrowed his eyes. Alasse gulped. She knew that voice, and what it meant.

"Yes, Ada." She mumbled.

"Well, I _was _going to offer to tell a bedtime story, but..." Elrond began.

"A story?!" The girls looked up. "Oh, we'll get ready for bed, Ada!" Arwen cried with delight, grabbing Alasse's arm.

"Right away!" Alasse nodded.

"I had a dreaded feeling you were going to indulge in their little conspiracy, my friend." Elrond told Thranduil.

"I may be a little too laid back with my daughter, but that does not mean I am_ entirely_ going to spoil my children rotten." Thranduil said, easing back in his chair.

"I'll go see if they need help." Celebrian chuckled and stood up, kissing Elrond's cheek as she walked out.

"I'm afraid your daughter is inheriting your infamous knack for twisting debates to get your own way." Erestor gleefully teased Thranduil. The Elven king glared dangerously at the librarian.

"Are you saying that I am disagreeable, Erestor?" Thranduil hissed.

Erestor grinned. "Come now, _mellon. _You are not the most easy-going elf at council meetings and such."

"Very efficient, don't you think?"

"You _don't _want to know what I think." Erestor said, drinking his wine.

"Keep it that way." Thranduil huffed.

* * *

The next morning at breakfast, Alasse was greedily reaching for another blueberry cake. "Don't you think you've had enough, penneth?" Elrond laughed.

"I'm only just making myself feel at home." Alasse shrugged. Thranduil looked away. Legolas and Arwen's brothers snickered.

"Oh, I see." Elrond shook his head.

* * *

It wasn't even lunch time when Arwen came rushing into the sitting room as Elrond was heading to his study, crying and grabbing her father's robes. "Why, what's the matter, my little star?" Elrond asked.

"'Dan and 'Ro are being mean again, Ada!" Arwen wailed. Her beautiful royal purple satin dress was soaked. "Alasse and I asked if they would take us riding and they splashed my dress from the fountain. My dress is all messed up!" Arwen sobbed.

"Alright." Elrond knelt next to her and brushed her tears away. "I'm sorry they did that. I will have a talk with them. In the meantime, I'm sure your Nana can help you get dried and find something else nice to wear."

"_Alright." _Arwen nodded tearfully and raced to find her mother. At that moment, Alasse entered.

"Ada, Legolas and the twins hurt Arwen's feelings!" She announced.

"We know, Alasse." Thranduil nodded.

"Her _favorite _dress! That was so mean!" Alasse continued.

"I will talk with them, little one." Elrond assured her.

"They should be punished." Alasse growled.

"Elrond will take care of it, Alasse." Thranduil reminded her.

"Ahh, yes. The starry-eyed sentimentalist who does not know hardship." Alasse sighed, shaking her head dramatically. Thranduil nearly choked on his wine. Elrond turned and stared at her.

"I beg your pardon?" Elrond arched his eyebrows.

"You do not understand how difficult it is to run a kingdom fraught with danger, like Ada does."

"Now, Alasse." Thranduil scolded. "That was not a very nice thing to say."

"I'm sorry, Ada. But it's because..." Alasse stared at him in shock.

"Because what?" Elrond asked, curious now. _"Do_ go on."

"Because you..." Alasse began but her father interrupted.

"Alasse, you may not speak to grownups like that. In fact, you've been rather impertinent to Lord Elrond since we arrived here." Thranduil said.

"I am sorry." Alasse hung her head shamefully.

"What has gotten into you?" Thranduil frowned.

"Oh, I have a remedy for that, my friend. With your permission of course." Elrond spoke up.

"By all means." Thranduil nodded, knowing the healing lord of Imladris wouldn't do anything too drastic.

"_Tell me, little one,_" Elrond put on his best stern face and crossed his arms, "are you ticklish?" Alasse's eyes widened.

"_Uh oh..." _She gulped and already started giggling nervously, backing away.

"What was that? You are?" Elrond teased her wryly.

"Oh, indeed she is!" Thranduil nodded.

"Ada!" Alasse scolded, stopping dead in her tracks.

"Probably the most ticklish person I've ever known. She's even worse than Legolas." Thranduil grinned cheekily.

"Is that so?" Elrond smirked.

"No, I'm not!" Alasse yelled and spun on her heel, trying to dash for the safety of the door. But, alas, she was not fast enough. For a strong hand grabbed her arm from behind and she fell to the floor. "Ahh!" She squeaked, already snickering. Then the hand grabbed her ankle and removed her shoe and started running his evil tickling fingers up and down her stocking foot then across her toes. Alasse laughed dizzily. "Oh no! Not there!" She howled, wiggling around on the floor.

"Ahh. You are right, _mellon nin._ Seems she is very ticklish after all." Elrond grinned down at his laughing victim, as he knelt on the floor next to her.

"Careful, my friend. She has a wicked kick when you attack there." Thranduil warned him playfully.

"Hmm. Then perhaps I should resort myself to different territory." Elrond said, and slightly let go. Alasse jumped at the opportunity and tried to quickly scramble to her feet, but the healer was faster and grabbed her around the waist, picking her up from the floor. She kicked her legs wildly, trying to get away.

"Hey, put me down! Let me go!" She protested through her laughter.

"Oh, I don't think so, you little magpie. Ahh, this spot looks rather sensitive to me." Elrond pretended he was studying hard and lightly brushed the back of her neck. Alasse squealed loudly, rolling up her shoulders.

"Adaaa!" She called out, but her protests were drowned out by endless giggling.

"You are very right, my friend. She _is _worse than Legolas." Elrond chuckled triumphantly.

"Oh, you've hardly even started yet, Elrond." Thranduil grinned.

"No?"

"Oh, yes. And she has been rather rude to you since our arrival."

"A-A-Adddaaa!" Alasse howled mirthfully. "Tell him to stop!"

"I see." Elrond smiled smugly, walking over to the sofa. He sat down and placed the squirming little elfling on her back on the cushions! She giggled nervously up at him as he held her down (but not too roughly). "I've yet to find you weak spot, little one." Elrond said 'glaring'. "Tell me, is this it?" He poked her armpits and she scrunched up into a little ball. "No? Maybe here then." He squeezed her side and she yelped.

"Aaaddaaa! Oh, Ada, save me!" She shrieked.

"I never interrupt a healer when he is in consultation, penneth." Thranduil shook his head nonchalantly, calmly drinking his wine.

"Traitor!" Alasse retorted. Elrond lightly skittered his hands up and down her sides. Alasse howled and wiggled wildly, arching her back.

"Aha." Elrond said, snickering. "Oh. I still did not check this spot yet." He clawed his long fingers on her little stomach and Alasse screeched with laughter.

"Nonono! Stop, stop!" She squealed, trying to curl up and protect her middle and trying to grab his big hands. But, having practiced this method on three other children _many _times before, Elrond was much faster and stronger.

"Ahh. So this is your weak spot." Elrond smiled smugly.

"No, no! No, it's not! I'm not ticklish..."

"You are at my mercy now, young one." Elrond declared in a growly voice.

Alasse giggled hysterically as the elf lord dug his knuckles in and lightly tickled her tummy. Alasse laughed and squirmed crazily. His soft, nimble fingers tickled worse than her father's! And that was saying something. "It tickles so bad!" Alasse howled. Thranduil just sat in his chair, laughing heartily, thoroughly amused as he watched the great healer teach his daughter a lesson. "Oh, please! Please stop!" She begged.

"Well, are you sorry for not respecting your elders?" Elrond asked, slightly taking his attack down a couple degrees. But only slightly, resorting now to slow, spidery touches which made her twitch like a worm.

"Yes, yes! I'm sorry!" Alasse spluttered quickly.

"And do you promise to be good while you are under my roof? Hmm? Do you?" Elrond insisted.

"Yes, I promise! I'll be good! I'll be good!" Alasse scrunched her eyes shut, shedding tears from laughing so hard.

"And do you promise not to tag along after us everywhere we go?" Legolas asked as he suddenly appeared behind the elf lord.

"Ahh, Legolas. I did not know you were there." Elrond snickered.

"I heard screeching and thought I might need to save my little sister. Until I saw that she was caught by the Tickle Monster. Well, I wasn't going to miss that! Would you like some help, Sir?" Legolas grinned evilly. Legolas _never _passed up the opportunity to 'torture' his little sister in that way.

"Oh, no! Not _him,_ please!" She pitifully begged Elrond. "You can tickle me if you want, but don't let him!" Although Elrond's tickling was maddening, he was still gentle with the child. While...Legolas? Legolas was ruthless!

"Maybe I could give Lord Elrond a few lessons on your most ticklish spots." Legolas teased darkly.

"Nooo!" Alasse shook her head. Elrond dug his fingers in deeper and tickled her stomach again.

"As you can see, I am perfectly capable of managing on my own, penneth." Elrond said. Legolas shrugged, but couldn't resist giving his own spidery touch to her one shoe-less foot that Elrond had stolen her shoe from. Alasse shrieked and tried to jump away but could only limply fall back, laughing her head off.

"Please, no more!" Alasse panted helplessly, unable to fight back anymore. "I've learned my lesson! Just stop! I can't breathe!"

"Well, I wouldn't want a patient of mine to die from my own hand." Elrond relented and held up his hands in surrender. Alasse curled into a ball, trying to catch her breath, still giggling. Elrond patted her back, still chuckling himself. "Alright, I release you to your father." He said. He took her hand and helped her sit up. Alasse ran across the room and hopped into her father's lap and lounged there, panting.

"I'm sorry, Ada." She said.

"Maybe now you will not act like a little know-it-all." Thranduil said.

"No." Alasse shook her head, lazily lying her head on his long arm. "I won't."

"You deserved it, _Tithen muinthel._" Legolas said smugly. "Lucky for me, I am much too old to be manhandled so, and for that I am greatly relieved." He rubbed it in her nose gleefully.

"And what makes you think I _won't _make an example of you, young Thranduilion?" Elrond replied rather derisively, a wicked grin on his face.

Legolas's blue eyes widened in horror. He couldn't possibly imagine the composed, stern lord of Imladris...oh, he wouldn't! He...he...just wouldn't! "You're jesting, my lord," Legolas gulped, his voice coming out more squeaky than he'd intended.

"_Am I? _It seemed to work with your sister. And I haven't lost my touch as everyone seems to think._"_ Elrond used the coldest voice he could. Legolas glanced at his father for help. Thranduil arched his eyebrows and casually drank his wine.

"Yes! I'm tired of being tickled." Alasse grumbled, curled like a cat in Thranduil's lap, worn out from the attack. "It's Leggi's turn to suffer."

Legolas stared at Elrond. He'd thought the healer was scary before, when he was forcing him to take medicine, and showed no emotion. But that sly grin was overpowering. Without a word, Legolas fled for his life. "He looked rather petrified." Elrond remarked casually.

Thranduil burst out laughing. "I believe you succeeded in frightening him, my friend."

"What was it you called me, Alasse?" Elrond asked. Alasse curled up tightly, afraid he was going to tickle her again.

"N-n-nothing!" She shook her head, raising her hands defensively.

"It was most disrespectful, Alasse." Thranduil said firmly.

"But, Ada! You said were the one who said it first!" Alasse gasped. Elrond froze and Thranduil all but choked on his wine. His face flushed a deep red.

"What's this?" Elrond grinned, most intrigued.

"Nothing, mellon. Nothing." Thranduil said quickly.

"But, Ada, you said..." Alasse began.

"What? What did he say, little one?" Elrond asked.

"He was the one who said that you were a..."

"Why don't you go and see if Arwen is ready to play again? I'm sure she's dried off by now." Thranduil suggested.

"Alright." Alasse sighed, tired now. She slid off of Thranduil's long legs and made for the door, but turned first. "Are you going to tickle Ada too, Master Elrond?" Alasse asked innocently. Thranduil blushed with horror.

"I'll have his head first!" Thranduil growled.

"Ada!"

"No, no, little one. I have something _better _in mind." Elrond smirked.

"What is it?" Alasse asked curiously.

"_Go." _Thranduil commanded her. Alasse skittered out of the room.

"I might have known." Elrond looked down on Thranduil, as if he was correcting one of his children.

"Well, you know how it is, Elrond." Thranduil grinned sheepishly. "People say things they don't mean when they are under tremendous pressure..."

"Mmm." Elrond grunted slyly. "Where are those sons of mine?" He turned toward the window.

"Don't even think about it, Elrond!" Thranduil snapped.

"Think about _what?" _Elrond asked wryly.

"Don't give me that, '_think about what'_! You know perfectly well what I mean. You were going to list the aid of your addled sons to assist you in pulling off this whatever '_something better' _nonsense is."

"I contemplated no such thing." Elrond glared, but with a hint of a smile. "I was going to lecture them for their unbecoming treatment of their sister."

Thranduil threw his predatory gaze. _"As if _you expected me to believe that lame excuse. But, if that's your story, Elrond, then you, by all means, stick to it. A fine defense that would make in court..." Thranduil retorted snarkily, "after you and your sons have managed to scandalize me."

"I wouldn't risk your anger!" Elrond quipped sheepishly, leaving the room.

"I do apologize for my daughter's unusual behavior." Thranduil sighed. "It's not like her to be _that _sarcastic. I'm afraid she's been mingling around her older brother too much, especially since we came here. As you said, Arwen has her mother to set her straight. But, Alasse has no sister or any other siblings. She only has Legolas, and well, he has become more stubborn and outspoken as he's grown up."

"I disagree, Thranduil." Elrond said.

"Do you?"

"In fact, to my ears, she sounded exactly like _you!" _Elrond laughed as he left the room to find his sons.

* * *

That night, again, Elrond said that he'd tell the girls a bedtime story. Erestor, and even Glorfindel offered to take his place, but the girls begged for Elrond. They liked his dramatic flare, and his theatrical voice that made them shiver giddily when he presented his tales. Tonight, he told them the memory of when his sons had pretended to be hurt, just to get his clothes smeared with the jam and berry juice they'd used for 'blood'. The girls grimaced and giggled at the details. "What did you do to them, Ada?" Arwen asked eagerly.

"I had them personally clean my robes." Elrond said.

"But, that must have taken a very long time. Did it work?"

"No. But I knew it wouldn't." Elrond grinned.

"You should've also made them take baths. It would serve them right." Alasse said.

"What? Are you implying that I do not know how to bring up my own children?" Elrond frowned darkly.

"N-n-no, Sir! Just that..." Alasse stammered timidly. She'd done it again. She _was _hanging around her brother too much, and had picked up too many of his retorts to Arwen's brothers.

"Looks like another lesson is in order." Elrond arched his eyebrows playfully. Alasse's eyes grew wide as the reality of his implication hit her. He started to smile.

"Oh no!" She shrieked with a giggle, and ducked under the bed covers. Arwen knew that look on her father's face, and she too hid under the blankets.

"Oh, you can't hide from me, little ones." Elrond laughed. "I've got you this time!"


End file.
